Do you remember that scene in Toy Story when Buzz Lightyear swears he can fly and he demonstrates it for the other toys. Woody gets angry and says, "That wasn't flying! That was falling with style."
Falling with style is something I aspire to do. Look, I fail. All. The. Time. I'm sure I fail at something every day whether it's hitting my word count, cleaning, or being a good mother and/or wife.
Yesterday was a particularly difficult day for me. There's some stuff going on in real life (boring, you don't even want to know), but I find my heart and my mind pulling me in two different directions. I know my mind has the facts right, but heart just won't listen.
The same thing happened to me with writing recently. Two completely different books. Two directions. But I can only move forward with writing one at a time. (I could probably work on both, but I'm sure that would impede my creative mind since I'm tend to immerse myself in writing projects.) I made a decision. Then second-guessed it. Then made it again. Then second-guessed it. Then, yesterday, made it again. Each time I made the same exact decision, too!
I guess this is why people have affairs. Why people switch jobs for no real reason. Why people do all the crazy things they do. Their heads know the truth; their hearts see the dream. Somehow we have to find a way to reconcile all of these things and move forward.
So while I know I'll continue to trip and fall, I also have to remind myself that getting up is the best thing I can do. Because if we can't fall with style, then we just become pathetic heaps on the ground.
I don't want that. Do you? So, I'm only going to allow myself one viewing of one of my favorite depressing songs (I'm a redhead, so this one is close to my heart).